writen by Len Burton
photos courtesy of Jason Tetterton
The long awaited Bubba Army reservist weekend called for an amphibious assault on the beaches of Atlantic City, New Jersey. The army was definitely present and accounted for. The marks were in Full Trucker Effect July 12, 2008 in Atlantic City. There hasn’t been more Bubba Gear seen in one place than the Double Wide parked at the kayfabe compound at the BRN, Parts Unknown.
My name is Len and my buddy Murley (AKA caller “Squirrelly Murley from Phila,” & “Wheelman”) and I are big Marks from Reading, Pennsylvania. Our local BTLS Army chapter (just the two of us) traveled to Atlantic City for Bubbapalooza, starring Ned. We planned on arriving in AC around 2:00 pm in hopes of seeing the stars of the BRN floating around the Trump Taj Mahal Casino before they got ready for the evening’s show.
Well that was a good plan as Murl and I had great timing during our first walk through of the Casino floor at the Taj; we saw Bubba the Love Sponge® playing craps, right there on the floor. I was surprised to see that his baby T-Rex arms could actually reach the table to grab the dice off the board. But seriously, it was cool as shit to see Bubba, we didn’t want to go bother him while he was gambling so we continued walking through the casino.
On our way to the elevator bank I spotted this beautiful woman with some monster boobs in a “Go Green” tank top. I took notice of the shirt because the capital “G” in “Go” barely got around her right boob. They were huge and amazing. Anyway, I look up at the man she’s with and it was a fresh out of the oven cooked down Brent Hatley. They walked right past us. Just as my thoughts put it all together that it was actually him. We called his name, and he stopped and came over to us. Right away he asked our names and shook our hands, and seemed happy to see a couple of fans. Murl and I were super pumped of this citing; and unlike George Bush; the Bubba Army means it when we say Mission Accomplished.
The show didn’t start until 9:00 but we wanted to meet up with the full Bubba Army before the show, so we arrived at the bar just outside the Arena around 6:00. The Marks were in FTE to the tenth degree. The show’s gear was all over the Trump compound and it was getting thicker by the minute. Like ants the Marks were beginning to swarm and my anticipation grew.
One thing the Bubba Army needs is a salutation of some sort. Murl and I saw the marks, and we felt like we needed something to yell to them to acknowledge the Bubba Army. I mean we yelled “Bubba Army” or a plain old “Hey,” but that seemed pretty plain, we need a Marine equivalent to the “Ho aaahh,” possibly, a one or two word slogan? Any suggestions Army?
So look at the lineup for the for this event; Trump Casino, drinks, food, Hot summertime ladies and the Bubba Army all converging onto AC. Plus, we are so close to NYC that maybe some of Howard’s Crew will make an appearance. Doesn’t Artie have a shore house in Jersey? That is a great potential brew for a killer party so was Bubbapalooza starring Ned. Very few words describe the show; but “Fucking Great!” will suffice for now.
Right at 9:00 pm the lights went dark in a packed Arena of 2500 Bubba Marks at the Trump Taj Mahal. On a huge screen came the image of none other than the Hulkster. In his best wrestling style commentary Hulk Hogan introduced the show. I’m psyched, this looks fucking cool!
Manson opened the show with a musical bit that brought the house down; he and the Nedettes did the “Livin’ Lavita Locka” parody song.
A montage of Bubba “through the years” photos scrolled across the screen above the stage, as Spice Boy rolled out to kick off the show as the MC. Spice was funny; he told a couple of jokes and got the crowd ready for what was sure to be a great night. He gave a preview of the night’s performances, including dropping a hint about some of Howard’s New York posse possibly being in town and making an appearance at the show? Nice!
Spice hit a hookah on stage as 25 cent sat holding up a cardboard hand made sign that said ”Clap Niggas.” I am glad they are putting 25 to good use.
Spice introduced none other than the man himself Bubba the Love Sponge®. He came on stage in a killer throwback light blue and maroon Mike Schmidt Philadelphia Phillies jersey. Nice move Bubba. That’s a great way to get a Philly crowd on your side. We love our Phillies in this town, so thanks man.
Bubba entertained the crowd for a little, and then brought out Miller for his set. The crowd really took a shit on Miller, he had a few good jokes, but other than that he should really stick to dieting and trying to look like the fat guy from that movie Superbad (Jonah Hill).
Manson did another bit with the Nedettes and then Spice and 25 came back on the stage. 25 did some stupid naked bit that just ended badly.
Brent came out next and did a killer spoken word set, starting off by asking “Where the weed at?” He opened his set defending the need to legalize marijuana by citing some pertinent facts about it being the less dangerous alternative to drinking and drunk driving as well as the money it would generate for the US Government. He makes a good point. Brent exclaimed the he is “a Marine, a Lover, a Fighter and a Politician”. He thanked the service men and women for defending our country and for their bravery. He called for lower fuel prices, closing the Enron loop hole, to stop filling prisons with non-violent criminals and he blasted the government for its failed attempt on the war on drugs to the tune of $27 trillion dollars. The spoken word was dedicated to Henry Rollins, whom Brent thanks for giving him the courage to do it. He closed with the quote “Live Long and Strong.” Powerful Brent. Powerful!
Manson performed “Gotta Go to Ya Yas.” What a killer song. Manson rocks, can really perform and has some great musical talent. He can dance too (for a Florida white guy he has some real rhythm). After the song he did some character voices from the show and brought the house down. He did the Ferret voice, Big Dick and that funny ass Irish voice. He closed with a NASCAR parody tune that sounded just like the album track.
After intermission Bubba confirmed that Sal would be doing some stand-up during the show and Artie Lange would be closing. The Army went nuts, as you could believe.
Bubba messed with the crowd a little more and did some of his “its all about ME routine.”
He equated his show to the Donnie and Marie variety show on crack, and he is right. Bubba brought some Jabrone fan named Wayne on stage and embarrassed the shit out of him. He did this just before he beat the shit out of Tom the Treeman with his Tater Mitts. Man he ripped the shit out of his chest, his back and his bald head. OUCH!! Man you could see how red his skin was. He also shocked the shit out of his neck, AND got an eager volunteer fan pretty bad too.
The show continued with crazy antics by Bubba, 25 cent, Spice Boy, Chip, Miller, Hammil, and a surprising quick musical performance by B Fudd — He was in the house: “Gweat!”
Ned, the star of the show introduced himself as he came onstage to dark blue lights. We couldn’t see much of Ned, but we could hear him and he rocked the house. This old guy can sing. He can dance too, you could see the faint dark image onstage really jamming and getting around. He did the “Man Fucker Song,” the Brent Hatley bits,” “Live Like You Were Frying,” and “Radio Star.”
Bubba sang “Forty’s and Blunts,” admitting that he bombed from drinking too many Sex on the Beaches and dipped into the rattler for a taste; confessing that a fan gave him 30mg of something. You could tell he was full hot on the deal, and was hilarious!
Sal came on stage and did some hilarious but offensive material. Out of the gate he said the crowd looked like a Klan meeting without their sheets. He was raunchy and funny at the same time; I hope he had some security shadow him for safety on his way home. I’m sure he pissed off someone in that room.
Bubba brought Artie onstage, who was dressed to the nines as expected. It looked like he put the outfit together from his bedroom floor. His trademarked cargo pants, T-Shirt and a Jack and water. That’s actually part of the outfit, the Jack and water. Like you and I would wear a hat, Artie puts a drink in his hand as part of the outfit.
Artie was hilarious in his own right putting on a brilliant, nearly one hour set that had the crowd rolling in the aisles. Being in Philly Sports Country Artie discussed the rivalry between Philly and NY sports, made a point to remind us that Troy Aikman is a faggot, and Romo is a Homo! He shared some stories about his recent comedy tour trip through Afghanistan and made a ton of hilarious show references. Ending with the famous Grandpa Al Lewis chant, Artie led the crowd in a “Fuck the F-C-C” chant. He then chugged the rest of his Jack and Water, yelled “FiYa” before leaving the stage.
Bubba came out one last time to close the show, thanking the fans profusely and wishing all in attendance the best for representing the Bubba Army. He told all of us to go meet him in the casino bar for some party time and that he appreciated us coming to the show.
The Arena emptied fast after the four hour show, and Murl and I coincidentally ran into Spice Boy and Twenty-Five Cent who we quickly congratulated on a killer entertaining show. They seemed gracious and asked us to hang out at the bar.
Thank you to the boys at the BRN for a great event, as well as an opportunity to party with the Bubba Army. It was great to see such a loyal gathering out in full force. I can’t wait till the Bubba Army sees Active Duty again.
Great review!
feel like I was there. Nice job.
BUBBA ARMY!!!!
Great review!! Right on point!!
This guy should be a writer for the BRN!!
Thanks for the comments boys. Rock and Roll ghost thanks for letting me post the review to yoru blog, way to lay the pictures in there, it really came out great. Go Army!